Every since I became a mother what I consider to be worthy of sentimental value has changed dramatically.
Before I had Elenore I would have thought you were crazy if you looked at a napkin from your child’s first birthday and said “I should keep this”. Why in the world would you keep a napkin? Isn’t the pictures from their party enough? From my new perspective I have to tell you, no. Just having the pictures is not enough! You want a napkin, her tiara (that she wore while smashing her cake, of course!), a balloon, and the invitation that you sent out to all your friends and family (Whether they wanted it or not).
Another thing I thought was nuts? How many pictures mom’s posted of their kids. Don’t get me wrong, I loved to see all my friend’s and family’s children grow up before my eyes, but I always thought, “Isn’t one picture a day…. or even a week, enough?” My new found mommy perspective says “NO!” They change so fast! I literally took dozens of pictures a day, and only posted 1-2 (OK, maybe more like 5-10, but hey, I showed restraint, OK?) I wanted to show everyone every thing she ever did. From her first burp, to her first steps. Everything had to be documented. Matthew’s thing was video taping. We have hundreds of videos from Elenore’s first year of life. Its really kinda funny.
I am thinking this now because last night we purchased Elenore “big girl pj’s”. What are big girl pj’s you ask? They are just long johns. You know; ones that have 2 separate pieces, not just a footsie pj. They are super cute. One set has purple owls all over it and it says “I’m to cute to spook” and the other one is pink with a princess on it. I was super excited to put the owl one on her. So last night after bath time, I put this outfit on her. (It took lots of wrestling too. I joked that I didn’t need a gym to work out, just have me put an outfit on my child) After the wrestling match that ensued, I looked at my child. She looked so grown up! I suddenly had this mommy moment. I’m sure all you mom’s know what I’m talking about. Its the moment when you realize how fast time is really going and how big your precious child is getting. I had my mommy moment and said to Matthew “she is getting so big!” I suddenly felt like I needed to cry. All over PJ’S! How ridiculous is that?!
Then later that night when she curled into me and stuck her ridiculously cute toes into my face (her new thing), I thought it again “she is getting way to big”.
Its the truth. You find out your pregnant and the horribly long wait starts for you to hear their heart beat. You think the 10 week appointment will never arrive. Then it does. You hear that precious sound of your child’s heart beat beating along, and you can’t believe that you are carrying this precious child. Then the wait happens again. The grueling wait till your 20 week appointment where you can find out whether you are having a precious baby girl, or a bouncing baby boy. You literally feel like you are never going to make it. People give you their guesses, and reasons as to why they think you are having a boy or a girl, and you personally also have your guess. (I personally think that Mommy’s intuition is always right) People start touching your belly (strangers and all). And you think “am I no longer a person? Just someone people think they can touch at will?” I literally had a moment during my pregnancy that someone was actually petting my stomach. I had this moment where I thought I might actually hit this person. It was horrible.
Then the day arrives. My doctor told me I couldn’t go to the bathroom before. I had to have a full bladder. This is beyond cruel to any pregnant woman! We literally have to pee every half an hour, so to tell us that we had to hold it, is just cruel and unusual. They push and prod your tummy (make you feel like and maybe actually pee your pants a bit lol) looking for all the information they need. This whole time they wont tell you what you are having till all the “essential” information is collected. I was dying, it took my tech 30 minutes to get all the shots she could. The whole time I had to pee, Elenore was kicking my bladder and the tech’s prob, and all I wanted to do was to go to the bathroom and then know what I was having. Finally my very enthusiastic tech said the most amazing words I have every heard “you can go to the bathroom now”. (I know, not what you were thinking) After I had come back she then told me what I had been waiting for, “you are having a girl” . My world literally stopped. I was having a princess. I was having the baby I had dreamed about my whole life. I KNEW I was having a girl. I even had her name picked out way before I was even pregnant. Back in High school I picked the name Elenore Rose, and it stuck. I had been having dreams of a beautiful dark haired, dark eyed child my whole life. I knew I was having a girl first. Call it mommy’s intuition, I call it a dream from God.
From that point on, there really isn’t anything fun to keep you occupied till D-day. You just have to trudge along (because lets admit it, by this point, you are TIRED!).
Then the day finally arrives. After hours (and maybe only a few for the lucky momma’s) you are handed your child. That moment is the most amazing feeling in the whole world. I heard her first cry and I started to cry. I never cry, but I did when I heard Elenore for the first time. Cherish that moment and every moment after that; because what feels like a minute goes by and they are smashing their cakes one their first birthday, and then you blink and they are graduating High school.
Life is way to short, live it for the Lord and live it to the fullest.